Welcome to the Inner Sanctum.

From here, you may proceed to one of three further, even more innerer sanctums, or sancta. If you will.

These are known traditionally as “tiers”—perhaps to suggest access to the tiers of a theatre, the different audience platforms within an auditorium.

The Royal Circle, the Dress Circle – all the way up to the Gods.

All commanding different views and degrees of elevation and bestowing different status on the attendee—and with different prices attached, accordingly.

The Theatre being my usual place of work anyway, I have decided to price access to my on-line content as though it were the Royal Albert Hall you were attending, through a portal in the comfort of your own home.

The Royal Circle: £25pcm

The top tier grants you a personalised membership pack, including:

  • a signed and numbered certificate of patronage,
  • a letter of thanks, and
  • a high-quality print of a professionally commissioned caricature portrait of Simon Evans—
  • or a high-quality photograph from any of those pictured on the website

…all signed by Simon.

plus:

  • two free tickets per year (up to a max of six members per show, on a first come first serve basis) to any live tour show advertised on the website and
  • full VIP hospitality package after the show. (Details will vary from venue to venue but will essentially be a private drink with Simon and any other Royal Circle members in attendance that evening.)

Email request with Subscription number, Terms and Conditions apply.

And—BEST OF ALL!!!—the idea for your favourite joke/routine of Simon’s, written in Biro on the back of a beer mat—to prove that you were there the night Simon thought of it in the pub!

Plus everything you get in the lower tiers—OBVIOUSLY—including:

  • early notice of ticket availability, including BBC recordings
  • access to all the digital material on the website and Patreon, the archive, blogs and
  • links to other projects whether video, audio or text.

The Dress Circle: £5pcm

£5 per month gets you:

  • immediate access to all the digital content—plus
  • early notice of ticket availability for all live shows, BBC shows, radio recordings etc… and
  • 25% discount on all merchandise that we have planned, to come available very shortly.

The Gods: £3pcm

The Gods gets you access to all my on-line content, the instant it hits the website – just as it would in a theatre, but without the awkward leaning-over-the-balcony bit. No restricted views, no bad acoustics, you will hear it and see it every bit as clearly, in real time, just as well as those fancy-pants hoity toity big spenders rattling their jewellery in the Royal Circle.

But that’s it. Anything else you want—merchandise, tickets for live shows, chance to meet The Chief in a stylishly lit dressing room for Court Gossip and Prosecco—these you pay extra for. It’s a remarkably good deal and can be upgraded at the twitch of a credit card any time you feel you have had your toes in the water long enough and want to get your trunks wet. If you’ll forgive the mixed metaphor.